Ch-ch-ch-anges

When you’re a kid, you want so badly to grow up. Every birthday is so special. You even count the half birthdays. When I tell someone my son’s age, I must put the quarter year in to be precise. That much closer to 6… 7. My daughter, Abby, couldn’t wait until she turned 10, as we had made a deal that at the age of 10, she could get her ears pierced. I am also amazed when the kids start to read. That opens a whole new world. First, they can learn more. However, it also means that Brad and I cannot spell words when we don’t want the kids to understand. I have heard some parents speak another language – even Pig Latin – for that very reason. Or we simply cannot talk about surprises in front of them anymore. But I digress.

In the 12 + years I have been married, and the 10 years I have been a mother, I too have changed – in good ways of course. Brad has changed, also for the better. Everyone in the family is a moving target, and with that we all need to learn how to adapt to each other’s growth and development. Some changes happen slowly enough, that we adapt automatically. Or perhaps my cycle of life matures at the same time as the kids’ cycles. Other changes might happen more quickly, and we need to quickly adjust our cycle to keep up.

One example that comes to mind is Abby. She has clearly stated that she is a pre-teen. We know she is getting smarter and more self-sufficient. That’s superficial stuff. Sure, she can be moody. That gets more into psychology. But the biggest change, and perhaps one of the most exciting, is her need to learn about herself as a girl turning into a woman. She asks us questions. We read books together. We talk. She shares her feelings with me and Brad. It makes us happy that she feels she can trust us as her parents and as people with the answers. So instead of perhaps dreading the changes, we celebrate them. And, by the way, Brad and I are changing with her.

My point? As a child grows, she can also grow out of… toys, books, phases. But G-d willing, she will never grow out of us.